My Life

Letter

Sun, 02 Nov 2008 06:43:12 GMT

Have you ever wanted to write a letter to someone and tell them something you couldn't tell them in person, but wanted to? That's me right now. If you want to read my letter for someone read on.
Dear BB,

I want to tell you how I just realized how much you made an impact on my life. Then you just disappeared. I didn't hear from you or see you. I wanted to though, I still do. Do you know what I did from the last time I saw you to now? I've tried to forget you. To leave all my memories of you in Texas and in the summer. Now when I saw you a few nights back and I get warm in your arms it all came rushing back. I have missed you so much, I can't handle it. I crumble under any memories of you. I want you to stop looking at me that way. What way you might think. In a way you make me feel like I'm the only one you care about in the world. that you want to listen to my every word. In a way that when your eyes light up that make me believe you only want to look at me. How you dazzle me and I can't form a coherent thought. It takes me time to know what I want to tell you when i look into your eyes. Your arms make me feel safe and that I never want to leave. I feel light-headed and dizzy. I wish you were around more. I want to hear your voice no matter what you say, weather you are ranting or going on about what new experiences you have went through. I am happy to just be in your presence. To just rest my head on your shoulder, makes me smile. I miss you. I want you back in my life. Somethings have happened and the only person I want to talk about them with is you. No one else will listen to me like you would. I don't feel scrutinized by you when I tell you something. all you do is listen and I love that. We still need to watch that one film we talked about. I can't even think about the title without thinking about you. I don't know what to do with all these feelings. Do I hide them? Do I yell to the heavens that I care for you more than I should? Tell me. Do you care about me as I do about you? I can't stop thinking about you. I walk in a daze because it is easier to imagine that you do like me in my head. I live in a constant dream. I want to reach for your hand an hold it close shutting my eyes to the outside and focusing on our physical bodies touching. I don't want to let go. I bring this upon myself, forcing those eyes so lovely of yours to haunt me. All I want is to hear your voice, to fell your arms wrap around me in a hug, to see your eyes looking at me, to see your smile directed at me. That's all I want, to spend time with you. I just wanted to tell you this.

Sincerely,
Me.

Have you ever...?

Sun, 26 Oct 2008 04:27:37 GMT

Have you ever felt like you weren't yourself? Like you weren't living the life you feel that your suppose to? That's how I feel. I want to change my life. To reinvent myself. I don't know how though. I don't know anything and it scares me. I might just be feeling emotional, but I've been thinking about it now for awhile. Can you tell when you see me walking down the hall? Do you even notice me? Do you try to meet my eyes? Can you tell I'm thinking about something? Do you ever wonder what? Do you even care?
I want to do so much, but how?
I want to slowly change myself, but retain the essential part of me. It doesn't feel like this is my life. I want to go back and start over. Can I do that? If I can where do I sign up? I want to let go. Of everything. All of my problems, thoughts, everything. Does that sound drastic? There are so many things I wish would go away, people included. that sounds harsh. I don't know what is going on anymore. Everything is different. I want to go swing. I want to swing higher and higher leaving everything behind, until I can fly. Then leave it all behind. This isn't making any sense.
I want everything to change. I'm not living in the right time period. This isn't the life I'm suppose to live, this isn't me. I don't know anything anymore. I want it all to change or go back to before.
I want to live. What would that entail exactly? Life is going by so fast, I can't keep up. It's junior year and my life feels like a one way track. How will I know I've reached my destination. Will I cease to exist? I don't know what being alive means. I want to feel it. Feel life running through my veins, breathe it in. Does this sound weird?
I want to know how many people's lives I have affected, have I even done that? It feels like I haven't done anything. I want something to happen. Have I changed your life? Did my way of thinking influence you in some way? Was it for better or worse? If my seat were to be empty the next day will you notice? What thoughts would run through your head? I'd notice if someone was gone, would I get the same treatment? Do I deserve it? So many questions, so few answers. Would even care I wasn't there? How about the next day? How many days will go by until you notice or care? Well, I feel silly now.
I'm reading Before I Die by Jenny Downham it's making me emotional that's all. Strike through and erase everything else. Forget I even said anything.

Sat, 27 Sep 2008 03:50:26 GMT

Hey All.
I doubt anyone is really reading this, but oh well. =] Not much has been going on in my dull life. Over the summer I went to Texas to visit my grandma. Trust me: you do not want to sit on your rump for over 27 hours with only a few breaks in between ranging from 10 to 30 minutes. I had fun, I haven't seen my grandmother in a year so it was great caching up. I've lost a bit of weight, not very noticeable though. I got my license so I drive everywhere. It is fun. Nothing much else happened this summer. School started and I have great classes. I have three classes with one very good friend. Although I didn't move up in choir. I'm still in Belle Voci. And this year, it's just horrible. We can't even all sing the same pitch at the same time. Much less tune a chord. I hope it gets better, but those hopes aren't too high. I have a class with this guy, Mike. The people over on the dating thread on the lexicon know all about him. The thing that makes me happy is that he no longer creeps me out. At the start of the year I couldn't stand being in the same room with him because I was hyper aware of him and it was disturbing, now I don't care. Today is the first time I don't have homework over the weekend since school started. Woot! Hmm, I was going to say something but I cannot remember what. *thinks and ponders* Oh yes. Over the summer my grandma noticed I was lusting after some things in BCBG and said that if I lost more weight by summer she would buy me all the clothes I want from what ever store I wanted. I have a small fascination for designer clothes... And my dad said he'd give me ten dollars for every pound I lose. I think that is motivation enough. I like clothes, especially designer clothes. I'll have to push myself a lot, but it will be worth it. =] I think my favorite designers right now are YSL (rip) and Chloe. Then one day after school I was talking to two of my friends and I bring up YSL and they looked at me very strangely. They didn't know of him or that Coco Chanel and Giorgio Armani were real people. they said I had a murderous look in my eyes. That made me smile. I can't imagine how someone does not know that.
That is just a brief update. So long for now.

Mall of America Stephenie Meyer Signing

Thu, 08 May 2008 06:07:31 GMT

Yesterday I had the great chance to go see Stephenie Meyer at the Mall of America. I live about 50 minutes away from the MOA so after picking up one of my friends we left town around 6:55 am. We went in through the main entrance to the mall and went to Barnes and Noble. All the stores were closed and the MOA had erie feeling to it as we walked through the halls. We reached the Rotunda soon enough and the line was already long. If you have been there this will be easier to visualize. The Rotunda is a circular area with on one side an elevator and an entrance and the entrance to the underwater adventure, on the other side is the entrance to Nickelodeon Universe (formally known as the park at the MOA and before that Camp Snoopy). Well the line started on the side where the park is and then wrapped around the rotunda pass the elevators and into the adjoining hallway. We had a spot next to the elevators. At a bit after 8 am they started selling the books and screams of joy could be heard. We stood in line for about half an hour. We bought our books and received our wristbands. Since many of the shops weren't open yet we bought something at starbucks and found a giant black cushion right next to the rotunda and began to read the host. Sometime around 9:30 we began to shop. We spent our day up until 1:30 shopping. Some fans though stayed and read the whole time, only leaving occasionally. We ate lunch and then did a bit more shopping until 2:15-ish when we decided to go back to the first level. We went into barnes and noble and went back to the black cushion to read some more. Around 3 pm my mother told us we should go sit in line so we can get our books signed quicker. At around 3:45 we went to get ice cream at coldstone after knowing that some Twilight Lexiconers were going to meet there. We didn't meet everyone that was going to be there, but we did meet EbonyCircles. *BIG WAVE IF SHE'S READING THIS* After talking to her a bit we all walked back with her to the rotunda. We found my mother where we left her and after giving her her ice cream she left to wait for us and read Twilight in Spanish. We waited in line until around 5:30 when we were squished together to fit more people. Then a few minutes before 6 pm the Barnes and Noble person announcing came on stage and everyone just stood up and listened to him. All of a sudden I heard sequels up towards the front where Stephenie was near the stage waiting to go on. She walked on and more screams could be heard. She decided not to do a presentation and reading, but to answer questions only and then sign books. I recorded the whole thing on a voice recorder and took many pictures. After she was done it was about 6:30. We waited in line for another half hour. We had our books signed exchanged a few words with Stephenie, she really is sweet, and got off stage. A woman took a picture of my shirt which Stephenie commented on. Then we waited for my dad who was on his way to pick us up and passed the time by reading. The day was over much too quickly, but I enjoyed every minute of it. Below are the pictures and videos of the event.

I will pst more stuff later. =] TA!

'Lo I am not one of the undead, as much as I wish to be

Sun, 13 Apr 2008 05:08:22 GMT

Hey I'm not dead. Even if I do wish to be one of the undead. hehehe. Well so much has happened lately I don't know where to start.

I had my birthday. So I am now one year older and maybe a bit wiser. That was back in March. Oh, I'm not as angsty anymore, but still a bit that just may come with the territory of being me though. Well I have a kind-of love interest if anyone cares. I doubt anyone is actually reading this but oh well it feels nice to document my life a bit. He's really nice and the wonderful ladies at the NBOAD board at the Twilight Lexicon think he likes me I'm not sure. I'm trying to talk to him more outside of school and get together to watch a movie I've seen twice and own that he also wants to see. Maybe this coming weekend. For my birthday I went to the MOA with a couple of friends. It was a very joyous event. I had spring break, which I didn't do anything over. Then all too quickly the month of April came.
I was just confirmed yesterday in the catholic religion. It was okay. Although my mom was disappointed that I didn't "feel" anything, I felt the warm oil on my forehead isn't that enough. She says she was about to cry when the bishop was confirming me. Then today was the celebration mass. It was fine. We just watched a slideshow and were given our certificates. Then my parents took my godmother and I to eat. I ate so much. It was ridiculous. I finished my food quickly and then I ate the Triple chocolate Meltdown at Applebee's. It was heavenly. *sigh* I LOVED it.
After being confirmed, well more so in the process of being confirmed, I have been helping in the making of a new religion. We have Cullenism, but what of those Twilight fans that perfer werewolves? At the Twilight Lexicon we bring you Quileutism. I have made a photobucket and e-mail for the religion. It is alot of fun you should check it out. Head over to the Twilight Lexicon Message boards and look for the Quileutism thread in the Flight to Phoenix Forum.
Now in school we have to write a paper on our futures. And when I hear my classmates saying they don't know what career to do their papers on I can't help but think that I am pathetic. I already know what college I want to go to (Marquette in Wisconsin), what to major in (physician assisting), what my career will be (physician assistant), and who I will interview (my biology teacher's wife). It is really sad if I do say so myself.
I feel this is a nice segway into what else I'm going to say. I get to skip school a whole day to meet Stephenie Meyer! YES! yay! WHOOO! and any other exclamations that are used in celebration. She is going on her host tour on the sixth of May and going to be at the MOA. My dad said he is letting me go with any friends that are also allowed to skip that day. Woot! I plan on getting to the mall by 7:20 - 7:45 am. Which means I'll actually have to get up earlier than normal to be there. Kind of ironic. I'm even making myself a tee shirt for it. It makes me really happy. =] :D So, if you're going to the signing tell me so and maybe we can meet up. Want to hang out with some Twilighters/ Twi-hards that day. I'm really excited for it.
Well I think I just gave a decent recap of my life so far.

One last note: I really hate how people my age speak. Ugh. It just bugs me. Are we so incapable of speaking english or something? How many times does one need to say 'like' in one sentence? Another what is the effort to say 'decent' instead of 'dece'? hmm? Those really just bugs me. I also really want to strangle who ever invented chatspeak. I mean I understand it while writing a quick text message and don't have time to type out the whole word, but in actual text like this. Or worst in a story/paper. It just hurts my eyes.
Well I think I've said enough. See you around the next bend. *waves*

Just Listen....or in this case read

Sat, 16 Feb 2008 07:11:36 GMT

I just finished reading the book Just Listen by Sarah Dessen. It's a good book I highly recommend it. Dessen's stories are always so real, something that could happen. It's often I read a good book but reading a book that makes you feel something is rare. Not even my favorite book, Twilight by Stephenie Meyer, reaches that level. While Meyer's books provide me with an amazing love story that cannot be ignored and just keeps you captivated, Dessen's are slower paced but still hypnotizing. They make me feel like the story is moving at a real pace that it's actually happening. I've only read two of Dessen's books they both left me mesmerized, pensive.

I finished Just Listen and I felt something within me change. I've been thinking of the same topic for days now, it's wonders what not having a voice does to you, and I just had an epiphany. History truly does repeat itself but not just in huge events, such as wars, but smaller ones that at the moment you think it'll be a memory soon enough and brush it aside. If you are not fully aware of what you do you repeat your habits, your errors, your past even if it is in the smallest of ways, the smallest of similarities.
To explain this I have to go back to last year around this time. So few know what happened and those few are enough, they were the ones there for me. The ones I truly hold dear, the ones I call my friends. At the moment I have so many thoughts bustling in my head demanding to be written down and not forgotten like so many others before them. I know no one might never really read this past the words written but each person is different these words might actually mean something to them. See, what I mean I just totally went off subject, too many thoughts, just like I think in what time should do, I'm going to slow down and really write what I think taking one thing at a time. Maybe really what happened last year isn't the beginning of this story maybe it's a concept.
It's strange how sometimes a word, a quote, a sound, a picture, a movie, but more importantly music, a band, or more so a song can bring so much back. It can bring you back to a moment, a memory, even in some situations most strongly to a specific face, a specific person. Right now I'm listening to a song and it brings me back to a certain night at a friends house, a specific moment that night. I remember the laughter, the glowing television, and us talking. To me it seems that for almost every person, every friend I have, there is a song that reminds me of them no matter where I am. That's what I mean you hear a song and the first thing you see in your head is a certain person. Those are the songs I like to hear often the ones with happy thoughts. I often find myself skipping over certain songs that once made me laugh but now remind me of an error I want to forget. But, you see, you can't forget, you'll just do it again. And now we're back to where we started. History repeating itself. See, I just let my thoughts run from my brain down my neck, into my shoulders, down my arms, past my elbows, move slowly towards my wrists, and then finally to my fingers on to the keyboard and on to the screen. It was all a journey. In a constant cycle. I now find myself in a similar transition as last year. Last year around this time I was sick, this year once again sickness plagued me. Then the question of fate comes in. Was I destined to be sick again and only have it as a piece of evidence for what I realized? And you can't talk about fate and destiny without religion. It is so rare that one could that. Personally when asked what religion I am, I say catholic. But are the catholic church's beliefs really truly my own. No, my beliefs are separate from those of the church. This past sunday I had my interview to become confirmed, what I said in that room were not lies, as I so often lead on to people. I truely do believe I'm ready to be confirmed. Sure, I still don't agree 100% with what the church does but, in reality not everyone sees eye to eye, not everyone is on the same page. I'm ready to pursue, stick to, and live my beliefs. As you know this last Wednesday, I really didn't have a voice and I am just getting it back. But the discussion going on this week, even if it was mostly our group leader talking, reflected my own thoughts that have been going through my head. See, if you read earlier I said I had the same thoughts for days now. history repeating. As I was saying, the discussion were almost my thoughts, my own running monologue.
Honesty. Telling the truth. Whatever you call it, what is it? Or how about this, lying? If you lie straight forward to someone it's bad, right? In most cases, yes. But what if you didn't lie you sacrificed the lives of many. But if you lie you potentially save yourself and others. Another thing that annoys me is why is it that a human life is seen more redeeming, more worthy, more valuable than that of another animal. Because humans are animals as well, or did you not know? But, that is another rant for another time and place. Back to honesty and lying, but what if you don't tell someone the truth but instead retained it? Are you still lying? I'd like to think so, although you are not actually lying to someone just retaining information I still think you're lying to yourself. Wishing it away like those error filled, saddened memories that a specific song brings up in you. Again now we are back to the beginning. What really is the beginning? Back to last year? When I started the book Just Listen? When i decided to read the book? When I bought the book? When I first heard that song so many years ago that now reminds me of last year? There is no definite start to this story. This is real life, we are all connected in some strange way. All of our stories overlap in some way. All of our own memories, ideas, stories entertwin. Now, this reminds me of the book The Five People You Meet in Heaven. Another excellent book, you should read. That book also made me think but not about the same things that I am now. though it does deal with the same theme I just mentioned, our lives all overlap. Now, for once since I started writing I have nothing to really say. I know what I want to say but, not how to get there. Now, if our lives really do overlap and can directly or indirectly affect other's lives, am I the link between to different people, two different me's?
As I said before I just read Just Listen and this book made me realize so many things. And now I made personal connections from today to last year that I have been unconsiously making. You might be thinking well what happened last year that also now? Once again I find myself in the same situation. On the outside I might appear the weird girl that always likes to be surrounded by her friends. And I do like being surrounded by my friends, but I also might seem like someone that does stange things yet are somewhat normal but also silly. I apppear to be enjoying life and I am. But, right now this girl on the paper the one writing these words, the one sitting on her bead with her feet touching and a space between her legs, sitting almost cross-legged, with a laptop balanced on her feet and calves. The girl wearing sweatpants and a loose fitting t-shirt for pj's with hair in a ponytail and no makie-up on what so ever, licking her lips every few seconds because they are chapped but is too lazy to get up to her bag and get it, the one that is sniffling every few moments listening to a song from Rent. That's who I am. To those that really know me have seen this, they know I'm actually rather shy not as outgoing as I appear. This is who I am. And to really understand what happened last year you need to understand that.
What happened last year around this time was that I did something so out of character something so bold that not even my boldest friend has done. Of course I'm not going to say exactly what happened but when things didn't go as I planned I thought it was over. I was in a somewhat catatonic state. I would never try something so bold again, I wouldn't take the risk again. And I swore to myself I'd be more careful. And I was I wouldn't let myself fall into that trap again, I wouldn't go in blind again. I thought I was over that. But of course I heard a song that brought me back to that moment, more so that person. When I finished Just Listen that song was playing on my stereo. And I couldn't help it I wept. But before you start feeling sorry for me, it wasn't like last year's cries that my comforter had a damp spot. No, I cried because I realized that I wasn't careful that I had gone in blind again, just in a differtent way. It was more like I was wearing a mask that not even I could tell what I was doing. And it just took the finishing of a book and a specfic song. Now is it painfully obvious how the concept of music, song, bringing back a memory of something or someone, my true self, my epiphany, and honesty all tie in together? Just a while ago it was 11:11, okay almost an hour ago, and I stopped and started to wish. I don't know if you know about 11:11 wishing but when you wish for something when all the numbers on the clock are the same the wish comes true. Well, I wished for some silly things, but I really wished for the ability of being able to take life one day at a time, maybe even one moment at a time. Like Annabel Greene in Just Listen realized toward the end.
On an ending note now. Back to the music concept, you know how couples normally have a song? I wonder for how many of them is that song their actual song? If you are not following my train of thought, remember back to a song bringing you back to a certain person. For how many of them does that song bring them back to each other? I remember when I was little and I first heard that song that makes me think of last year, the song is Dreaming of You by Selena, I always thought to myself that would be the song for who ever I married and I. No matter what my mind was set on it. Not even if the person I was to marry didn't like the song I figured if they loved me enough they would let me use that as 'our song'. And my mind set remained so even through last year I still love that song even if it makes me think of something I rather not think about. But, now I don't think so anymore. When the time comes that I do have to sit down and pick a song we would do it together and choose a song that truly does remind us of the other. I think one of the few plans I have now is just to try to take things slow and slow down time my own way and take things one at a time.

That was a lot to process. But I'm still in a bit of a Valentine's Day spirit. *insert sarcastic laugh* I am now going to explain why people my age do NOT understand love. Warning: this is purely fun but, are my opinions. Feel free to stop reading here.
At the young age of being a high school student, how much do we know about love? I'd argue not much. After all what do we have to go on about what love is? Our parents? Many parents are divorced/separated or are in the process of either. Those are not very good examples. What we see in the media? Ha, don't make me laugh. How much of the media can we believe? What is love? Or better yet what is love for a teenager? Is it just a feeling you have that you care about someone? I have that feeling for my friends that aren't that close to me, does it mean I love them? Or more so an intense infatuation? My vote is for the latter. Of course then you have your different types of love. Friendship, romantic, family, and others. I could say I love the book Twilight but it's not like I'll have sex with it. O.o creepy. It's different than the love I have for my grandmother. I love my friends differently as well. Then you can go farther into it. Each type of love has different levels. In my family I love my parents equally but I feel something different for my mother than my dad. I feel different for one friend than another. Heck, I even feel different things about inanimate objects. So then what is love? If I were to say I love that boy. How would I know? Would it be that nervous feeling in my stomach? The sweaty palms? But I get sweaty palms when my feet are cold and I'm not wearing socks. See at this age we don't really know love, at least not the romantic kind. I think that we really do understand love when we've gone throug it and have knowledge. To me we only get that knowledge when we've lived enough and reflect upon it. How many teenagers, besides me, do you know that reflect on their life and actions. I'm going to guess not many. So how can a teenager know what love is? I am not saying I know what love is but, I have thought about it. Just something to think about, I'm rather tired now, and my mind finally free and relaxed after releasing all my cooped up thoughts. Although knowing me it will soon be filled again. Since I have nothing more to say for now, to you I have a few parting words. I recommend you read Just Listen, The Five People You Meet in Heaven, and Twilight. And I hope I could at least give you some mild entertainment and something to think about. I also hope that you might have gotten to know me better. And to you now I say CAKE! TA!

Random lists

Sat, 16 Feb 2008 00:02:39 GMT

I get home from school today and I start thinking to myself about something I posted last night on the lex. I was on the thread Weird facts about yourself. So of course I tell everyone about my weird self. Then I started to think up of other lists. And well now continue reading if you want to know random things about me in LISTS!

Weird things about me.
-I talk to myself (who doesn't)
-I talk to myself in accents
-I respond and have conversations with myself aloud
-I have to wear socks if I'm not wearing shoes (mostly out of habit and to regulate my body temperature)
-I have to listen to my iPod as I sleep
-I have a night time playlist for the above
-I stare at people or things while I daydream or think. (sorry if I've done that to you and felt uncomfortable)
-I don't remember the above dreams or thoughts
-I have to sleep on my side with the leg on top folded and raised up to look like the number four if you look from the top
-I have to sleep with my hair in a ponytail
-I can't stand being fully dressed while home
-I can only cough or blow my nose properly in the shower
-I have the habit of sticking a tissue in my nose when I have a runny nose so I don't have to attempt blowing it
-I pretend there are voices in my head and talk to them aloud
-I have a strange sense of humor
-The smallest things make me happy ex: having a white board since I lost my voice
-I hit my head repeatedly on a daily basis (on purpose and accident)
-I still take naps

Movies (That I like)
-Fools Rush In
-The Little Mermaid
-Sleeping Beauty
-Beauty and the Beast
-Breakfast at Tiffany's
-Sound of Music
-Forest Gump
-Titanic
-A Walk to Remember
-Rent
-Annie
-In the Time of the Butterflies
-Selena
-Pride and Prejudice (long version)
-Juno
-Romeo and Juliet (1960's version and newer version)
-Dirty Dancing
-The Wedding Planner
-Spanglish
-other classic disney movies
-Mrs. Doubtfire
-O Brother Where Art Thou?

Music (that I like/play often)
-Selena
-Blue October
-Death Cab fo Cutie
-Secondhand Serenade
-Ricardo Montaner
-Muse
-The Pierces
-Ana Gabriel
-3 Doors Down
-Soundtracks from the movies above
-All Time Low
-Dashboard Confessional
-Beach Boys
-Beatles
-Belinda
-Camila
-Montez de Durango
-Boys like Girls
-Donna Summers
-Gloria Trevi
-Hush Sound
-Jaime Camil
-Jennifer Pena
-Laura Pusini
-KT Tunstall
-Horoscopes de Durango
-Angles de Charly
-Linken Park
-Plain White T's
-Paramore
-Temptations
-Sum 41
-Red Hot Chili Peppers
-Red Jumpsuit Apparatus
-The Veronicas
-Vampire Weeked
-Kate Walsh
-Classical Music in General (clair de lune is a favorite)
-A bunch of random songs that I hear
-My musical guilty pleasure: Hannah Montana/Miley Cyrus

Books (that I like and read *= want to read list)
-Twilight Saga
-The Host*
-The Truth About Forever
-Just Listen
-Author: Sarah Dessen*
-Blue Bloods
-Circle Trilogy
-Princess Dairies Series(better than movies)
-Pride and Prejudice
-Warrior Princess
-1-800-WHERE-R-YOU series
-Uglies series
-Author: Meg Cabot* (haven't read all her books yet)
-The Great Gatsby
-The Daughters of Juarez
-Tuesdays with Morrie*
-Romeo and Juliet
-Night
-Peace like a River
-Veil of Roses
-The Crucible (play)
-Shakespeare*
-Jane Austen*
-The Lovely Bones
-Author: Alice Sebold*
-The Five People You Meet in Heaven
-Wuthering Heights
- In the Time o the Butterflies
-Sea Glass* (about to start it)
-La Semana de Cookie (children's book)
-Vampire Kisses*
-A Great and Terrible Beauty*
-Fallen*
-Author: Anne Rice*
-Author: Brothers Grimm*
-Cirque du Freak*
-Silver Kiss*
-Blood and Chocolate (book better than movie!!!)
-Stargirl
-Les Meserables*
-Maximum Ride*
-Author: Tamora Pierce*
-Midnighters*
-Author: Scott Westerfeld*
-Wicked Lovely
-ttyl trilogy

I think that might be all for now. I have some deep thinking going on that I'll type out soon.
And yes, I am the simply mortal reason on Fan Fiction.com check out my stories! I am also simplymortal314 on the Twilight Lexicon, talk to me on the boards.
Okay I am tired and hungry. TA!

Just... Some thinking

Wed, 13 Feb 2008 23:44:22 GMT

My illness has not gotten any better. =[ My voice basically gone. And I am in choir, so that is awful. I was carrying around my writing notebook to be able to talk to my friends. And if I answered a question in class well I had to whisper, and the whole room would be dead quiet. :/ quite unsettling. I really hope tomorrow will be better. Maybe next week I can have my voice back? Oh dear I hope it does. Well I should go finish getting ready for confirmation tonight. I haven't read the chapters yet, I am not participating in discussion am I? Well I shall go now. Oooo, I also get to stop at Target to buy Valentine's day things. hmm, perhaps I shall purchase a white board?

Okay, TA!

Wow that was short

Valentine's Day

Wed, 13 Feb 2008 04:43:07 GMT

I am currently on the phone with one of my good personal friends and since I don't like saying the names of my friends over the internet we shall call her leah. So Leah and I were saying that Valentine's Day is an absurd holiday.

I mean it makes any single person over 12 feel bad about themselves for being single. The only good days for that the were back in elementary school when you had to give your whole class a valentine and you were ensured candy and a sugar high for the rest of the day. =]
I miss those good old days. Don't you?
And at my school the week before the dreadful day they sell carnations and crush pop cans to send anonymously or with name to other people. I'm sure many other schools do this. And I can be positive that I won't be getting any. =[ Part of me does want one and also that this person I like liked me back. But you don't get everything you want do you? And fair is not what life is.
Then it annoys me when I see a couple (how do I put this politely?) show their physical attraction for one another in the hallways. (i.e making-out) I just look away in disgust thinking lust filled, hormone raging controlled teenagers. *insert face of disgust*
I also don't really believe in love at such a young age as mine. Because what really would we have to go on to think we love someone when we don't know what it is. Most of us only know the love between family and that is completely different than love for a friend or romantic love. And even then there are different kinds of love in the family. So what is love?
I don't know, just something to think about. I am off to bed now. Sweet dreams to all and to all good night. *starts singing so long farewell from sound of music* TA!

P.S. I did have my nap. It was very nice. =]

Eh...New here introdution

Wed, 13 Feb 2008 00:30:49 GMT

I normally have a lot on my mind. And I just needed a place to put it all. I really don't care if anyone reads this but, I guess it's more of a way for me to get everything out, you know? It's not that I have a stress filled life, I just like to talk... A LOT.
Well, a bit about me you ought to know? I am a female. I am obsessed with the book called Twilight. I write fan fiction. And there is not much else I can think of at the moment. Although I will say I am in high school.
The most stressful thing in my life right now is that I am recovering from a cold/flu like thing. I had a fever friday and saturday night. On Saturday I started to lose my voice. And on Monday and today it was practically nonexistent. =[ Which might be another reason why I'm on here so that I can say what I want without worrying my voice will crack/disappear, or I have to whisper. I think I deserve a nap right now, since I have virtually no homework.
There can be a lot more I can say but I think that is all for now. until later. TA!